Sandwich-beard

A rare species of mammal that lives exclusively on community college campuses. It is roughly seven feet tall, with a large hump in its back. This bipedal hominid has long, scraggly facial hair, which usually has bits of sandwich in it (from whence it's common name is derived; its scientific name is Sandwichus beardicus).

Several species of bird nest in its unkempt facial hair, and it cares for this colony tenderly, so that it can feast upon them at a later date. This "farming" method may denote some semblance of intelligence, though its mental capacities are dubious, as the creature seems to have invested over ten thousand dollars of its own money in a bad mermaid movie.

The Sandwich-beard uncurled from the foliage of the community college parking lot, emerging into the sun, and attempting (in vain) to find a mate.

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beard sandwich

The act of placing an individuals face in between two others who have luscious, beautiful and well kept beards.

Nick: "Hey Steve & Gary - I'm having a bit of a rough day. Would you guys mind giving me a beard sandwich?"

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