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A giga-penis
You know me and the boys are packing that schmeat
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“Max was wearing a fucking Speedo at the swim meet yesterday, that motherfucker got some SCHMEAT bruh”
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A below average penis, with one exception. If the schmeat is attached to a Knowlsey it refers to a penis so huge it changes the atmospheric pressure of any room it's in.
I can barely breathe with Knowlsey's schmeat in here
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Schmeat is the result of the marriage between the German Surname SCHMITT and the English word MEAT. It is a dick joke of Western Pennsylvanian origins, though its usage has flourished in recent years, especially among the Asian-American motion graphics animator population. In fact, its usage as a euphemism has become antiquated and archaic. Schmeat has actually evolved in to one of those rare catch all words on par with "fuck". Its versatility makes it the appropriate substitute for almost any part of speech.
"I'm gonna take a Schmeat!"
"Uh....Schmeat!"
"Schmeat!!!!"
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A small, yet not tiny penis (usually 3 inches or less) *Not to be confused with shmeat
Girl 1: "girl, big news...or little news that is"
Girl 2: "Omg, what is it"
Girl 1: "Johnny and I had sex last night, but its not as exciting as you think. Johhny has a schmeat"
Girl 2: "Well at least that makes me feel blessed that David is average"
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Schmeat is faux meat from soy or gluten sources. Soy meats include veggie versions of beef, pork, chicken and turkey.
I made a pizza with pepperoni schmeat. I can make a club sandwich exclusively from schmeats: veggie ham, veggie turkey, veggie bacon and veggie salami topped with soy cheese!
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