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Used by Jewish mothers to identify that you've got some kind of crap on your face
Mommy: You've got som Schmutz on your face, Oy!
You: blech!
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"Dirt" in German
Schumtzieg is "dirty"
Often used in replace of "dirtbag"
(oomlauts are replaced with an "e" after the vowel)(ie = i + oomlauts)
Kid smoking = a "Fuckin Schmutz"
German, Sie ist sehr schmutzieg
English, You are very dirty
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The rancid combination of cigarette ashes, food debris, spilled coffee and high flying man jizz that accumulates between the keys of your favorite keyboard. This combination of atrocities can and will lead to uncommanded keystrokes on your favorite browser, unintentional Facebook posts, and worst yet....complete keyboard failure as you are about to bust a nut on xHamster. RandyGoatRadio listeners seem to be unproportionately affected by this condition. Keyboard schmutz is best addressed by either getting another cheap ten dollar keyboard or running it through the dishwasher.
randygoat radio listener: I was surfing xHamster.com and all of a sudden my screen filled up wit T's and keep switching back and forth between tabs
MrPres: Oh .....you got the keyboard schmutz!
Tuna: My finger in my rectum!
Moo: That is why I have three keyboards
Dicky: **P2C**
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an oleaginous, sticky, greasy, often smelly, and otherwise noxious and unidentifiable substance.
Little Johnny wanked off and the schmutz went all over the bathroom mirror.
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A place-holder for any word you can imagine..a word to keep the conversation going!
Boy- "Hey, do you want to schmutz?"
Girl- "I will not have sex with you!"
Boy- "I'm simply asking if you want to go to the movies is all."
Woman- "What are you eating?"
Son- "Oh, just some schmutz I picked up at the store."
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Random, icky stuff that ends up on you or something else.
"Damn, I got schmutz on my shirt!"
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