Stagsgiving

The holiday you celebrate at home, alone, when you've decided you're really not up to facing a crowded house of extended relatives one more time and you simply decide that dammit, you're just not going to go this year, even if your significant other says she (or he) (but come on--probably she) is definitely still going to go and will be bringing the kids along, if there happen to be children in common.

The proper dress for Stagsgiving is whatever the hell you want to wear. Suggested attire: boxers, t-shirt, comfy robe. Also acceptable: whatever you wore yesterday.

You'll catch hell tomorrow when you're told everyone thought it was weird that you didn't show up and are you two getting a divorce or something or I had to lie and tell my mother you had to work. But it will be worth it. Totally and completely worth it.

It is frowned upon to close the bathroom door when peeing on Stagsgiving.