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A noun - Found in catholic boarding schools, Stumpfs tend to roam freely giving detentions for most often minor infractions. Distinct qualities of a Stumpf may include, but are not limited to: a large chest, overwhelming virginity, a snotty attitude, long pointless lectures, an obsession with the security of lockers, and an overall lack of humor.
A verb - (to stumpf)
Used to indicate when a person has seriously gotten their ass raped.
Noun-
"Oh shit! Tuck in your shirt quick, I see a Stumpf!"
Verb-
"I heard Billy got seven detentions for having his shirt untucked.Yeah man, he got stumpfed."
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Having a caveman-like appearance, such that his lack of intelligence and overall boneheadedness is blatently apparent at first glance. A bafoon.
Look at that guy with the really nice muscle car, why is he taking it apart and throwing the pieces all over his backyard? What a stumpf!
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A poo made unnecessarily long or lengthy because of smart phone, tablet, laptop or other computer/technology use.
Man 1: "Damn man, he's been in there for half an hour!"
Man 2: "Yeah. He's in there with that iPad taking a stumpf."
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To stumble uncontrollably in an alcohol educed haze in which older objects appear younger. Bad decisions have been known to occur while stumpfing not limited to: arrests, children, and cougar attacks.
dude1: holy crap i just woke up with a gmilf this morning, I didn't think i had that much to drink!
dude2: man when i saw you at the bar you were totally stumpfing your brains out.
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verb, used in progressive tense ("stumpfing").
To apply a pair of tighty-whiteys with profuse skid-marks to an individual's face, usually while they are sleeping or passed out due to intoxication.
That drunk guy on the couch fell victim to one awful stumpfing.
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latin word derieved from stump.
dumb ass lying sack of shit who likes to get it on with man whores.
she tends to carry around a big wang dang in her huge purse.
person 1:did you see stumpf yet?
person 2:no but i heard shes carrying around her wang dang again.
person 3:DAMN IT MUST BE HUGE,DID YOU SEE THE SIZE OF HER PURSE?
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A half-wood. Not quite a hard-on, but not quite soft. A stumpf!
I had a boner for some Romanian girl Oana in college, but I found out she was a lesbian and I only ended up with a stumpf..
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