Titistics

Titistics is all about calculating and measuring the mass of someone's tig ole bitties based on the cup size and severity of back pain they suffer from.

You might be wondering, what kind of tiddies are considered big? Well, based on lots of published data and the results from my extensive studies, I would say that people with a cup size over D or a bra size over 18 could be categorized as having large chesticles, with all other sized titties considered average or small. But fret not, because we love tits of all shapes and different sizes. Some of my favourites include Cinnamon-breasted tits, Elegant tits (loads of these reside in the Philippines), Japanese tits and I can't forget those gorgeous African blue tits, saw lots of those at Tenerife once!

With all that out of the way, let's focus on the back pain. My research over the years indicates that people with breast cups size D and above tend to have greater curvatures of the spine and poorer postures than small-breasted people. In some severe cases this can cause Scoliosis or Kyphosis. What's the difference? Well Scoliosis is a sideways curve of your spine, often taking the shape of a letter S or C. Kyphosis is more of a forward rounding of the back, which leads to you looking like the hunchback of Notre Dame. Another one of my studies found how prior to breast reduction surgery, half of 179 test subjects with size DD breasts or above had almost constant pain in their back, neck or shoulders. After carefully removing most of the excess titty mass (as if there could be too much of it), their pains relieved within 3 weeks or less. This is my experience in Titistics.

Titistics

The measurements of a females chest.

Alberto: I'm dating this new chick.
Dave: What's her titistics?
Alberto: 36D.
Dave: Sweet. What was that last girls titistics?
Alberto: 32A.
Dave: Yikes.

5👍 10👎

Titist

A man who only dates women with large tits, thus discriminating against those with small to normal breast sizes

Don't even try to talk to Zane, he is a total titist

28👍 15👎

titistics

titistics is the study of the collection, analysis, interpretation, presentation, and organization of tits

Dave used titistics to analyze the types, sizes and number of tits in the bar

11👍 9👎