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beauticide

All girls inevitably commit the self-destructive act of beauti-cide. Deciding to throw caution to the wind, and ignore the input of the opposite sex, women will eventually take matters into their own hands and perform a visual downgrading to their own looks.

Egged on by other already shitty looking friends, the hot girl will sooner or later, cut off her hair, add bangs, or start doing her makeup like shit. It’s inevitable and when it occurs, the woman makes a land speed record from hot –to- Not.

The most common occurrences come when a woman somehow convinces her self that short mousy hair is hotter than her long hair. Men all over the earth know this to be a myth, but men are powerless to stop the beauti-cide pheonomenon. What women don’t often understand, is that cutting your hair short, or cutting bangs makes their ass get fatter instantly.

The girls attractiveness and ability to attract males instantly drops by 20%.

Somehow, other women still encourage their peers into this masochistic act and the women blindly follow like lemmings off the cliff from sexy, to mom’sville. It appears all someone needs to say is “your fabulous” like some bizarre entry into a sex-and-the city set; and women will willfully destroy their beauty. Like a rebellious angry teenager they just piss on their sexiness for no apparent benefit other than to be true to their nature: bitches.

Guy1: "Hey, did Crystal’s ass balloon overnight?”

Guy2:“no dude, she committed beauticide and cut her hair short"
Guy1:“really its amazing how much fatter she is now”
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Guy1: "Jim, what happened to your girlfriend? "
Jim:“her friends convinced her to commit beauticide; I can’t date women with bangs, bangs look like shit and everyone knows their bitches”
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Guy1: Dude, I never knew she had cankles.

Guy2: I know they appeared to grow over night after she committed beauticide.

by Lascivious April 19, 2010

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