tending

Keeping the hair of the pubic region in check. Also known as tending (to) the crops/garden.

Tonight? As long as you've been tending, baby.

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Skoonspruit

(n.) The tiny garden-sprinkler thing your mouth does sometimes for no apparent reason.

(As defined by Douglas Adams' "The Deeper Meaning of Liff".)

You bloody clune! Clean your skoonspruit off my towel!

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bitchcraft

A(n assumed) form of sorcery cast by those well-versed in smack, often upon those trying to decipher what their gibberish is meant to communicate. Sometimes, however, a bitch may simply talk smack in order to cast a spell out of spite, even against their own kind.

Person A: Ima use bitchcraft on you, then yo ass be huge!
Person B: Bite my skinny ass!
Person A: Abraca-shizzle!
*creak*
Person B: Damn!

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tenoradozen

Any given number between eight and fourteen (where "several" denotes any number between three and seven).

"...and the Green Party received... tenoradozen votes."

"Hey, how many drummers have played with Nine Inch Nails this year?"
"I couldn't care less, ffs. Tenoradozen."

Clunes

(pl. n.) People who just won't go.

(As defined by Douglas Adams' The Deeper Meaning of Liff.)

Foxton Rich-Cashbucks: You clutz, servant, I requested a Long Island Twisterini from you nigh on an hour ago!

Farnaby-Chalmers: I do apologise, sir, I was held up by one boffo of a clune in the foyer. Those clunes get me every time, sir...

Foxton Rich-Cashbucks: And that, my dear waiter, is why you earn merely thruppence an hour, now be on your way.

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Indie Death Metal

A concept we couldn't quite get by EMI Records.

"Dude, I can't pronounce their name, but don't you love that new, obscure, Eurasian, Indie Death Metal band?"
"Leave, indie fag."

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