Pap Scratching

Adj: A moment in time whereby a member of the unwashed masses will begin to furiously rub themselves against a female's "lady bits" quite often leading to friction burns or a possible fire hazard. This episode will inevitably lead to a pap smear to rule out possible infectious agents.

Joanne: God i've an awful case of the pap scratchings
Deedee: Would you like me to rub some ointment on the affected area?

testickles

Adj:

1. Playful game in which a person named Tes is tickled.

2. The sexual act of gently stroking the testicles in order to produce a favourable outcome for the male in question. Overuse of this practice has led to an increased incidence of blueballs according to the North American Medical Journal.

Henry: Darling would you please perform some testickles on me?
Florence: Of course dear, just let me shave my knuckles first.

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