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Apsolute shit heap full of roadmen, chavs and pedophiles but the market is nice for 5p sour lollies
Person 1 - Ew look at that chav over there!
Person 2 - oh yeah they live in Newton abbot
Person 1- not surprised.
A large market town in south Devon inhabited by drunken Londoners and Chavs. The town became a shithole in the 1980s after Dr Beeching closed down the town’s railway works. Every street is full of Charity shops, Turkish barbers and takeaways. Large communist and Fascists movement has blighted the school’s.
“Hey man, is their a place more chavy than Birmingham?”
“Yeah, it’s called Newton Abbot”
When you are double penetrating with your best mate, and your balls collide with one another, like a Newton's Cradle.
Instead of demonstrating the conservation of momentum and the conservation of energy, the collision of the two hairy ball bags sets off a catastrophic reaction, in turn causes the receiving party of said penetration to inflate like a blow up doll. This is due to the uncontrollable amount of semen created by the Newton's fatal.
If you are unable to visualise the inflated party in this scenario, it's fairly similar to when Violet Beauregarde turns into a Giant Blueberry. Although, the mass of the seminal fluid will ground the person in question, preventing them from floating up into the atmosphere
Melanie won't be in work today, she's suffered a Newton's Fatal.
n. the phenomenon of excrement being forced from one's anus when lifting a sufficiently heavy object. The square of the velocity of the excrement is proportional to the mass of the object being lifted assuming constant excremental mass and constant acceleration of the object being lifted.
To every action there is always an equal and opposite reaction: or the forces of two bodies, one being the force required to move an object away from the center of a gravitational field and the other being poo directed toward the center of the same gravitational field, on each other are always equal and are directed in opposite directions.
I had a bad case of the mudbutt earlier this morning and my situation just got so much worse. Newton's Log just caused me to spray a conical mist of liquid ass all over the room. I need to change my pants, underwear and the curtains.
A mediocre guy either in looks, personality, or both. And although he is average in every way, he thinks he is basically Ryan Reynolds.
While they may stay fig newtons forever it is possible for them to transform into something…like an Oreo…..or even a chocolate chip cookie.
While they are rare, fig newtons can also be female.
Examples: Jeff and Lester from the TV show Chuck
Dwight from the office.
Frollo from Hunchback of Norte Dame
Farquad from Shrek
Prince Charming from Shrek 2
Hans from Frozen
J’son (Starlord’s ‘Dad’) from Guardians of the Galaxy 2
Mr. Collins from Pride and Prejudice (honorable mention Mr. Wickham)
Yeah, we talked a bit. But, he was a bit of a fig Newton so I’m not interested.
Oh, nah! He a fig newton.
He got that fig newton haircut.
He talks like a fig newton.
He was the figgiest of newtons.
The act of inserting a fig newton cookie into the anus of a sex partner prior to anal intercourse in the back seat of a car. If the cookie survives the act intact, it is usually referred to as a ford newton with cream.
Occasionally, to save money, we just go for a drive and have a newton ford for dessert.
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When a man's two testicle collide within the scrotum resulting in a painful feeling. Much like that desk toy with the swinging balls.
Why'd you stop running?
I have Newton Balls
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