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1. An anal retentive tool. A douche bag, but not in the literal sense. An uptight, tight-wad sleeze.
Dude, do you see that penile poppers bling bling? What a shit fucker!
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We actually don't know what a penile commander 2000 is, but we DO know, that it comes with batteries (batteries not included), it glowes in the dark, emits radiation and comes with 6 attachments, has a strapon tool belt, a safety guard (may dismember limbs and cause child molestation urges).
Flashing lights and animations not included.
Approptiate safety gear required.
The penile commander 2000 is the perfect gift for the necrophiliac in your family.
Warning: Not intended for use by loved ones.
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When you slay a Thot with your penis.
Penile Thot slaying is the only way to slay the Thot!
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When a big fat dick splits a pussy so bad that it rips the taint resulting in the poor bitch having to go to the emergency room for sutures.
Hello, 911, please send an ambulance immediately. I accidentally just performed a tri- input penile pentrometric episiotomy on this fucking bitch and she is bleeding like a stuck pig from the cunt and ass. She is in and out of consciousness and is going into shock. Her breath sounds are diminished and her heart rate is rapid and her pulse is weak. Her pupils are dilated and not reacting to light . She keeps screaming for more cock and an aspirin. Don't send the cops because I am doing bong hits and my medical marijuana card is expired.
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The code phrase for janitors to clean up what's left of a gang-bang that took place in a store's bathroom. Too horrendous for even Dirty Jobs to feature on their show, make sure to evacuate the store immediately if this god-forsaken phrase is blasted over the store intercom.
"Attention all employees, we have a code Clean-Aisle-Penile located in the head."
A 00 sized gauge located between the head of a penis and the testicles. There is a transparent tube in the center of each hand-made gauge to ensure that the penis is able to ejaculate without any interference. But the rest of the Gauge is made with a Belgian Doughnut.
"Dude, I just got new Belgian gauges!!" "Really, what size?" "00s!" "No way, but I don't see them on your ears, you sure they are 00s?" "Yeah dude, I got a Belgian Penile Gauge!"
"Dude, I can totally see your Belgian Gauge"
"Yeah My girlfriend likes creme filled doughnuts"
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The unique act of recieving an adequate, pleasurable sucking feeling around the shaft of one's unit. However, the catch is one must be voluntarily in and or confined to a wheelchair while using an oxygen mask.
Baby tooth heishman recieved his underage, and then proceeded to reveive a paraplegic penile mask from the 64 year old woman in the holding cell.
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