clarinet

Old-time slang for penis, most popular in the 1920's. Currently still very popular in nursing homes and anywhere frequented by octogenarians.

Suck my Clarinet, Callahan!

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Clarinet

A wood sucker.

Along with saxophones.

Another reason why clarinets are favored by so many male band direstors.

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clarinet

Codename for a black man's penis. Also a feeble insignificant instrument that is useless on it's own, and needs 50,000 other clarinets playing with it to be heard over a trombone. Loudest volume: messopiano, if they try really hard. Have no real use in anything but concert band, and are only put in marching bands in school because the directors feel sorry for them. Ever notice how there are no woodwinds in professional marching bands? Play melody 99% of the time because the writers don't know what else to do with them.

Clarinet players blow on big black things.

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clarinet

the stupidest instrument ever created. it sounds like a dying duck. the world would be benefited if it would disappear. a band/orchestra would have to be extremely good to drown out the disguisting clarinet noise.

trumpeteer: hey do u play an instrument
clarinetist/stupid person: yea clarinet
trumpeteer: then im not talking to u. ur not worthy.

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Clarinet

THE WORST INSTRUMENT MADE BY POOPY PEOPLE AND IT STANDS FOR CRAPPYCACA LACKING AIRY RUNTY IDIOTS NOOBS EXTRA TRUCKERS

POOP IS A CLARINET

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clarinet

Also reffered to as screech needles

Last competition Golden River Marching Festival
Clarinet Player: (clarinet screeches during the ballad) "ooopss"

During the scoring portion
Drum Major- 83.0
Color Guard- 94.0
Percussion-83.0
Brass-96.6
Woodwinds-45.7
Whole Band score- 70.1
Trumpet Section: Stupid screech needles ruined are chance of winning
Low Brass: What the fuck those stupid screech needles are always ruining everything
Drumline and Pit Percussion: At least we scored well
Flute, Saxophones, and low reeds: Those darn screech needles are always ruining our score
Color Guard: I feel like hitting them with a flag
Drum Major: I thought I taught you better than that.

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Rusty Clarinet

The act of being so horny that you look at your clarinet as a viable option to use as a fleshlight. Results may vary.

Aidan: “Oh, dude can I try your clarinet real quick?”
Renato: “Nah man, I was down bad and I pulled a Rusty Clarinet yesterday”