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An abnormal, chronic condition that utterly destroys the spirit of those unfortunate enough to be affected. Victims usually enter an initial phase of existential shock coupled with long bouts of heavy, heavy introspection. Symptoms usually include a decreased will to participate in all social activities, as well as a general lethargic and depressing outlook. This disease is highly infectious and may be transferred merely by word of mouth in fortuitous circumstances. This disease carries no race bias.
Treatment: Direct intervention by loved ones, making significant amounts of money, getting laid.
H: Sup Jones?
J: Oh, hey Haboob.
H: How's it goin?
J: Oh, dude.. I'm super stressed about all this reading I got to get done this week. Plus my arms are super sore from cleaning all those big ass boats all day. I don't even know what I'm doing with my life anymore(patient undergoes period of existential shock).
H: I was not expecting that kind of real shit. So... I guess that means you're not coming out tonight?
J: Nah man, I gotta get my shit together. I'll have like a beer or two... maybe. Hey, maybe you should start thinking about taking school seriously too.
H: ....
1 week later...
L: Sup Haboob?
H: Oh, hey Laz.... How's it goin?
L: Oh life's great man, I got this new job and I'm making good money. Hours are shit but its good. How's yours?
H: Aw, man. I've been studying all week and feel like shit. I feel like I'm getting too old for all this partying (patient undergoes period of existential shock). I gotta make money man, 20 is the new 55. I've been trading bitcoins all week.
L: Oh, shit. Does that mean you're not coming out tonight?
H: I'll come around, maybe have one beer.
L:....
2 weeks later....
P: Yo, Laz! Let's get hanned tonight~
L: Can't man. I'm allergic to beer.
P: Man, this dumbass nigga got the Old Man Disease.
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An elderly man that dreams of screwing women between the ages of 15-35, or women who look like they're 15-35. Often stare at their young flesh. They often try to score with them. Usually have to settle with porn or elderly women, unless they are very rich ( check sugar daddy)
Elderly man : Hey sweetie, can get me a soda pop from that cooler. These old bones can't handle such a low bend. Thanks hon....... No, that's not the one I wanted. I think you need to reach way at the bottom and get me another one. Thanks hon. You're a doll.
Girl 1: Ew. That dirty old man is staring at me.
Girl 2: Oh, I think that guy owns all of MacDonalds.
Girl 1: You know what, he looks pretty cute holding himself
on that walker like that.
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It's a super flacid penis that seems to never come to life, only with a pill called Viagra.
I wish I could get rid of this old man penis.
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When you develop leather-like skin caused by years of excessive tanning; looks similar to your dad's old worn leather loveseat.
"Whose that '40 something' ex-porn star/bar owner hanging out with those '20 somethings'?
"Oh, you know, that's just 'Old Man Leather'"
A fucking awesome Norwegian black metal band.
\m/ Old Man's Child \m/
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Relating to the inexplicable dieselness of of older men. This is usually on display in the gym when the burly gentleman in his 60s walks over to the flat bench, throws three 45 lbs. plates on each side (315 lbs. to those who can't add that fast), and proceeds to bang out 5 sets of 12 reps each with no warm-up. Other examples of this phenomenon are the inability to beat an old guy (particularly a father type) in a fair type regardless of your size compared to his and the seeming ability of old ass men to pick up and carry three times their weight.
Mitch's grandpa was in the gym today throwing up 420. Isn't dude like 70?
It's old man strong, kid.
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The condition elderly people suffer in the presence of younger people. Symptoms include but are not limited to refusal to lose to a younger person, refusal of being wrong, refusal of being at fault, and the urge to use age as justification for their actions, decisions, and opinions.
That old person didn't like reading this definition. His/her "Old man syndrome" kicked in, and he started complaining that it wasn't in proper definition form.
Younger person: You mean according to Webster?
Old person: Yeah
Younger person: Well, this is Urban Dictionary!!! Its meant for fun if nothing else.
Old person: I got 20 years on you! You dont know what fun is!
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