Autoeroticism

Self stimulation. Having a date with Mrs. Palmer and her 5 slut daughters, Auditioning the hand puppet, Badgering the witness, Bashing the bishop, Beating the shit out of your incapacitated midget, Beating the snotty end of my fuck stick, Blueball baseball, Calling down for more Mayo, Calling in the National Guard to assist you in a strategic crisis, Caping the crusader, Cheating on your other hand, Checking the plumbing, Choking the chicken, Tossing off, Trolling for the one-eyed walleye, Performing the tube sock tango, Wanking the white, Warming up the altar boy's dinner, White-water wristing etc. etc.

I've got nothing better to do with my time so I practice autoeroticism for hours on end.

40👍 8👎

autoeroticizing

1) the process of making a car sexy by adding performance parts or making it asthetically pleasing.
2) drooling over someone elses sex machine of a car
3)dreaming or thinking of what you want to do to your car to make it better/faster/ nicer.

1) Oh I saw a clean supra earlier, ever since then I have autoeroticizing about it.

2) Damn, I have been autoeroticizing about this slammed turbo GTI I saw last week with a fine girl in it.

retro-temporal-autoeroticism

the act of traveling back in time and haveing sex with your self.

if you travle back in time and have sex with your self, you have practiced retro-temporal-autoeroticism

29👍 2👎

Autoeroticize

1)A directive statement used in response to anyone's repugnant attitudes and behaviors which usually gets them to leave your presence while conveying how angry they've made you

2)Alternative phrasing/terminology for "fuck yourself"

Them: one day, you'll wake up and realize how little & unimportant you are without me.
Me: Autoeroticize, you entitled leech!