Rutherglen

Rutherglen is a small town in North East Victoria and it would be a complete and utter shithole if it weren’t for a few star attractions.

The best fish and chip shop in the world.
The best pie shop in the world.
A good as bakery.
And the pool, even though everyone there is fucking annoying.

The people in Rutherglen can be sorted into 5 main groups:

The Drug addicts: It’s not hard to come across one of these.

The Bogans: They wear singlets, have greasy hair, have an ankle tattoo, are seen constantly smashing a duzza, teeth issues and give their children rat tails

The Kids: The little kids are all assholes and there is no arguing. If you are not a legend, you will go into one of these groups:
Emos

Kids who hang out at the skate park
Kids with rat tails
9-13 year olds who wear tops showing their whole stomach.
Kids who think they can sing, and do so at the fucking shitty ass carols.

The Legends: These are the best people you will ever meet. They will talk like a bogan, but in a better way than a bogan. They are modest and may do some rebel shit but it’s all part of the fun. If you are in their posse you might as well be considered royalty.

Besides all that, it’s home to some good wineries and shops.

“Is he from Rutherglen?” said Joey
“Yeah, and he’s a legend,” replies Mikayla

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Rutherglen

Near Cambuslang

If you go to Rutherglen don't forget to pee on the side of the road.