firsting

The obnoxious practice of responding to a blog post/article/video with a comment saying "first." Generally this comment will have no substance; it is about nothing other than itself. When the first spot is stolen by a non-firster a firster will often resort to "second!" or "third!"

Blogger17: Long, thoughtful post about something important

obnoxiousname666: first!
annoyedbyidiots42: damn firsters, firsting all over the place

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firsting

Fucking your first cousin.

There weren't any bitches left at the party, so I decided firsting was my only option.

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First!

Something that attention-seeking children write as they desperately seek a feeling of self-worth for being the first to comment on a youtube video.

First!
First like and comment
1st

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But first

The transition catch phrase of Big Brother Chenbot.

"Who will be evicted tonight? But first! Mike Boogie is creepy."

"But first!"

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the first

the first evil; the root of everything that is bad.

The power of good will triump over the first.

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First!

Used by the very first commenter on a blog or forum to show they beat everyone else to comment first

1st Commenter: "FIRST!"

2nd Commenter: "Omg you are so lame no one cares if you are first congrats on your non-prize winning first comment."

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Firstness

Being a loser waiting in front of Best Buy for Black Friday sales not even knowing what the sales are just to be first for some bizarre twisted reason and not knowing the real reason for Thanksgiving.

I'm a loser for achieving firstness.

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